As it is usually done, instead of finding a legit solution for a problem, we usually find people to set blame. You know, there’s a saying that goes –
“A bad workman always blames his tools.”
We are all bad workmen because we always try to put blame on others for our faults, for our deficiencies. This is a universal truth and we cannot escape from its clutches. We turn defensive, we tend to block ourselves from an upcoming unknown attack; when we face a situation so bad that we couldn’t help but blame something/someone else.
Let’s see the common kinds of blame games we play in our society!
1. Was a boy involved in an accident? Then he surely must’ve been drunk till his head!
A common misconception is that all boys drink and drive. We’ve come across so many drunk-and-drive cases that involve only “men” that we associate this situation with any other man. Even if a man who isn’t a drunkard was involved in a gruesome accident, we deem it right to blame the man for being drunk! We see to it that the man was indeed – high; when in actuality, he wasn’t!
2. Was she raped? She must’ve been so provocative in her actions and dressing style!
Another common act of “Blaming the victim”. How can a rape victim be provocative in any sense? It’s so funny that we can even ‘think’ about it! If she consented to it, if she was really ‘provocative’, it would’ve been called ‘consensual sex’, not ‘rape’, right? This is an issue on an international level and it needs to be subdued, don’t you think?
Also, a fun fact from Google – If he’s your husband, it’s not rape!
That said, I could really die laughing at that dumb fact!
3. If a man who’s married can’t hang out with his friends properly, oh, it’s because his wife’s at fault!
To be frank, we cannot judge a person, or for that matter, a man. A man may be good, may be bad. It does not hinder him from blaming his wife at least a few times during the course of their marriage. Especially, when “friends” are introduced into a couple’s relationship, it will certainly go haywire at some point. Maybe, the wife couldn’t tolerate her husband hanging out with his friends all the time! Or maybe, the husband got bored of his wife… Both are at fault for the “Wife-memes” that are so popular on the internet.
4. “You did it!” she screamed. “No, you did it!” he yelled back. Break up ensued!
Ever seen a couple fight seriously? We’ll find words of blame littering about on either side of each party. The girl will yell at her about to be ex-boyfriend that he was the reason why their relationship broke. That he was a flirt and she didn’t deserve to be treated like shit. Then, the boy comes up with reasons of his own; that she hurt him and never looked at him enough. She had been a real flirt and not him! Oh, the drama!
5. Muslims in vicinity?! Damn, they must be terrorists!
Terrorism – a sensitive issue to tread on. It’s as thin as ice and breaks easily even if its periphery is trampled; chaos ensues then. We’ve had so many situations to believe that Pakistan is our arch-nemesis; and since it is a country of Muslims, we often see our “Indian” Muslims as Pakistanis too. Like, if we take our eyes off them for even a second, they’d be blasting up our country. Why blame Muslims for an act of terrorism?
6. Why did you give birth to a GIRL child?! You’re a sin that happened to our family!
This discrimination is still persistent in orthodox families. I won’t say “rural” especially because not all rural people blame a woman for giving birth to a girl child. Similarly, not all urban people accept a girl baby in their families.
Fun fact – Did you know that a sperm and an ovum fuse together to form an egg, which actually, is the baby? If you only want to blame the “ovum” part, wouldn’t the “sperm” feel lonely?
7. Gundae?? They’re Bihari’s for sure!
I always found it funny that whenever I see gundae in movies, they’re often from Bihar and nowhere else. Why is it always Bihar? Is Bihar a birthplace to Gundae or something? I really haven’t got any answers till now but even today, I see movies with dialogues – “Bihar se laye hain hum ye goondae ko!”
8. Our son/daughter started drinking, and smoking too? It must be because of his/her “Friends” because my son/daughter is pure!
Another funny reason to laugh at. From a parent’s point of view, this might not be so funny. Since I’m still in the youth category, I really find this funny. It’s completely the choice of an individual, you know, to drink or to not drink. One always can say “NO”. Very rarely, drinks are forced on us. It’s an option we have and if we choose it, we’re to blame; not our friends. But, parents don’t understand this simple logic and we don’t care to correct them because blaming someone who isn’t us is easier.
9. It’s all because of that smartphone that our generation is rotting away
Really? Again, it’s a choice. There are both good and bad sides to any invention or a situation. But, sometimes, smartphones are blamed for the silliest of reasons. The other day, I was sleeping during noon because I was tired and in the evening, my mom was like – “It’s all because of your smartphone! You love it more than yourself.” Well, I value sleep more than a phone so that statement wasn’t apt in my case.
But, this is a serious issue because we are losing ‘interpersonal’ connections in daily life. We spend all our time browsing through nothing on our phones and we’re leaving people behind. It’s a dangerous addiction that needs to be curbed.
So, that’s all I can remember, for now. A few societal blame-games made up this list of nine. Some are funny and some aren’t. Whatever they might be, we must be careful that they don’t affect our lives to a point of no return. ‘Coz anything in excess leads to destruction, these games must be kept inside certain limits.
If you remember any such games, please do add them to this list by commenting below!